This came to me in a late night Twitter exchange when @mcfangirl posted a pic of David Tennant in a somwhat familiar sweater. The 3 tweets that were originally sent have been edited for style and hopefully humor.
Enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: I don't own either Freddy Krueger OR David Tennant (biting tongue/smacking self backto reality); THE E-MAIL ADDRESSES ARE NOT REAL. Thank you.
*SPECIAL THANKS TO @MCFANGIRL (FOR THE INSPIRATION) @GALLIFREYNATIVE (FOR LIKING THE 3 TWEETS) & @SPYDURWEBB (FOR THE ENCOURAGEMENT)
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It all started with a
To: everyone@world.earth
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Missing:
1 sweater. Red and green in color with horizontal stripes.
If found please return to F. Krueger, Elm Street, USA
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
Found jumper but I like it. Fits great and matches with my specs. Keeping it. thanks!
D. Tennant, London, UK
D. Tennant, London, UK
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Jumper? If you're referring to my sweater, keeping it is not a wise idea. I cherish my sweater. It defines my identity.
Get your own. Please return.
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
Ah. Sorry. I'm Scottish and that's what we call them. And how can a jumper define your identity?
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Odd. A Jumper is a suicidal fool. How can a jumper be a sweater?
I'd still like it back.
You don't know who I am?
I'd still like it back.
You don't know who I am?
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
Attachment: see below
And I have no clue who you are, as I am a very busy person. You're just some bloke who's missing a jumper. How long have you been without your jumper?
Do you know who I am?
______________________________________________________ Attachment: see below
A Jumper can be many different things aside from a suicidal fool. I've done much jumping in my time and I'm in no way suicidal. And I've grown attached to this jumper. Not itchy at all - well, not anymore, at least. A bit tattered in spots but in fairly good condition. I was even photographed in it.
Do you know who I am?
To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
It's a SWEATER and this could not be it. It's been missing since 1990 but I know my sweater doesn't have snowflakes on the sleeve and the neckline is fixed. Are you sure this is mine?
And what the hell is up with that comment?
Oh, and I don't give a damn who you are.
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Now, now. No need for that type of language.
The snowflakes are just a little graphic at the bottom of the page. As for the neckline, I had it repaired as it was a bit tattered. I also had it laundered since it was quite itchy, which we found "property of F Krueger." Possessive much?
Did you know that the stripes are supposed to be black and not green? When was the last time you laundered this thing? 20 years is a long time to have a jumper go missing and unwashed. If you loved it that much you shouldn't have taken it off.
As for the comment, don't read too much into it. It's not about what you're thinking.
It's a SWEATER and this could not be it. It's been missing since 1990 but I know my sweater doesn't have snowflakes on the sleeve and the neckline is fixed. Are you sure this is mine?
And what the hell is up with that comment?
Oh, and I don't give a damn who you are.
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.engNow, now. No need for that type of language.
The snowflakes are just a little graphic at the bottom of the page. As for the neckline, I had it repaired as it was a bit tattered. I also had it laundered since it was quite itchy, which we found "property of F Krueger." Possessive much?
Did you know that the stripes are supposed to be black and not green? When was the last time you laundered this thing? 20 years is a long time to have a jumper go missing and unwashed. If you loved it that much you shouldn't have taken it off.
As for the comment, don't read too much into it. It's not about what you're thinking.
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT!
Who are you anyway to have MY sweater on in a magazine? A Model?
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Sorry but I told you I liked this JUMPER. Me? A model? Oh no! I'm not a model.
I'm a actor.
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YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT!
Who are you anyway to have MY sweater on in a magazine? A Model?
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.engSorry but I told you I liked this JUMPER. Me? A model? Oh no! I'm not a model.
I'm a actor.
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Even worse. I. WANT. IT. BACK.
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What's so bad about being an actor? What, may I ask do you do?
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Long story.
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Well, we've been going back & forth with this for a few hours. I don't have to work (thus the comment in the picture) and it's been quite a bit since I've been online. Tell me.
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VERY LONG STORY. Apparently you must be not that good an actor if you quit.
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OY! Now, I don't brag about being a good actor. I've had my fair share of work as well as unemployment.
As a matter of fact, I just finished 3 years playing the lead character on a show.
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Impressive. Who did you play?
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Even worse. I. WANT. IT. BACK.
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.engWhat's so bad about being an actor? What, may I ask do you do?
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st Long story.
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.engWell, we've been going back & forth with this for a few hours. I don't have to work (thus the comment in the picture) and it's been quite a bit since I've been online. Tell me.
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st VERY LONG STORY. Apparently you must be not that good an actor if you quit.
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.engOY! Now, I don't brag about being a good actor. I've had my fair share of work as well as unemployment.
As a matter of fact, I just finished 3 years playing the lead character on a show.
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.stImpressive. Who did you play?
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.engThe Doctor.
_____________________________________________________ To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
The Doctor? Doctor who?
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_____________________________________________________ To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
The Doctor? Doctor who?
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.engExactly!
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
You're beginning to annoy me. Perhaps I should tell you what I do then maybe you'll return it.
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
Perhaps if you were offering some type of reward, I may consider returning it.
I'm a patron of quite a few charities in my country and they would be pleased with any contribution they could get. No matter how small since right now, the American dollar isn't worth much here.
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Your life.
That should be sufficient.
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
My life?
You mean to tell me that you'd kill me if I don't return it?
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Yes.
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
In your dreams!
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
_____________________________________________________
To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
You're beginning to annoy me. Perhaps I should tell you what I do then maybe you'll return it.
_____________________________________________________
To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
Perhaps if you were offering some type of reward, I may consider returning it.
I'm a patron of quite a few charities in my country and they would be pleased with any contribution they could get. No matter how small since right now, the American dollar isn't worth much here.
_____________________________________________________
To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Your life.
That should be sufficient.
_____________________________________________________
To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
My life?
You mean to tell me that you'd kill me if I don't return it?
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Yes.
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
In your dreams!
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
EXACTLY!
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
What?
What are you a hitman or something?
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Attachment: see below
You could say that:
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To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Did you receive my last message?
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From: Maildaemon@elm.st
Your last message has been returned due to the following reason:
D.Tennant@london.eng does not exist.
~fini~
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To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From : D.Tennant@london.eng
What?
What are you a hitman or something?
_____________________________________________________
To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Attachment: see below
You could say that:
_____________________________________________________
To: D.Tennant@london.eng
From: F.Krueger@elm.st
Did you receive my last message?
_____________________________________________________
To: F.Krueger@elm.st
From: Maildaemon@elm.st
Your last message has been returned due to the following reason:
D.Tennant@london.eng does not exist.
~fini~
